The last months have been hard. In six weeks, I lost my beautiful dad, my cat Nancy and said goodbye to a very long-term contract with a business and people I loved. It all happened at the same time, and while there’s nothing you can do that will take away grief, what I am really grateful for is having strategies at my disposal to help me get through this.
The strategies were fresh in my mind because I was writing about them in my upcoming book just before my three losses happened. They helped me remember I have the resilience behind me to understand I am going to be okay.
Here’s what I do.
It’s very much about understanding who I want to be in these types of situations. So, while I obviously want to sit with my feelings and mourn, I also know to go, ‘Okay, you need to step up now and be there for who or what needs you, whether it’s your mum, husband, business’.
That’s instinctive for me because it’s very anchored to who I am and what I stand for. Yes, I’m deeply sad and give myself the space I need to feel all the feels. But that doesn’t mean I can’t also be grounded and still operate above the line. I don’t have to be horrible to other people, dismiss what they’re saying or not let them help me or even wallow in victim mode because of how I am feeling.
The three losses have been a lot but I’m grateful I’ve done the work so I know how to deal with it in a way that’s right for me.
What I’ve just told you is the short version, but anyone can have the benefit of being equipped with strategies if they choose to invest in their personal growth. The Universe works in funny ways and it was ironic I was writing about what I needed most. We all need a reminder that we do have a choice how we respond to any situation. (It’s all in my book—more details to come, but it will be released early 2024.)
The key is knowing you’re the only person who can get you through this. Others may pick you up off the floor, wipe your tears and provide company but only you can rebuild you.
We all have that choice.